How Do Passion Projects Begin?

When the world is topsy turvey; when I am in a harder than hard place;when things make no sense - creation seems like the best solution.

It was before my Mom was diagnosed with bladder cancer that I heard about my cousin who was dying. I hadn’t actually met him face to face more than a handful of times in my life, yet his story was very much a part of the perifery of my everyday. Mom was never without a story about anyone of the people whom she loved. She was so invested in people's happiness, their successes, their daily life travails. Linton, my cousin, her nephew, was a special one of these people. So, mom talked all about Linton on a regular basis - his accomplishments as a world renowned scientist, how he eventually moved with his wife and daughter to Pittsburg where he would command his very own lab on cancer research. She never failed to say how she loved her “Linty” and what a fine, noble, gentle man he was. At the time of his diagnosis Linton was 57. She was devastated when she got the news.

I too was so compelled by this tragic news and felt truly handicapped. What could I possibly do to help ease the pain of this terrible situation? I was uneasy with the knowledge that someone close to my age, someone related to me, someone who had a daughter and a wife and a very meaningful life, had it all turned completely up side down by a diagnosis of cancer. I was actually struck by just how deeply effected I was. I was often uneasy at night, so I started playing with wire lying about in my art supplies, attaching beads and praying. I prayed for this man, deeply wishing for him to beat the odds, and to live and return to a more joyful life. Eventually, wands emerged and there was a rightness about what I was doing. How did I know this? My heart seemed to sing - I was excited by each new creation. They were coming through me with an energy that felt like a gift to me, and I simply wanted to make more.

The prayers expanded – and I laid love and hope into wands that were specifically for beloved individuals in my life. Inevitably, I shared what I was doing with Linton, and sent him a wand. Miraculously, an email came … he was feeling a bit better. He made it to his Lab for a day or to actually work (did I mention he was a world renowned scientist.) His appreciation, his awareness of the white light and love coming his way thrilled me, and I had the most beautiful exchanges with him in the process. I wish the wands could have done more, I really, really, really do! I am left with a little bit of peace in knowing he was aware that he was loved, and he was prayed for, and I was wishing hard for him, just like I did when I was a little girl, with abandon and the deepest sincerity.

I kept crafting, kept wrapping wire with beads and wishes of a better everything for everyone. The virus was in full force as Mom was dieing – and though wands weren’t going to keep her alive, I made one for her to ease any suffering. She loved it, told me it was beautiful, and magical and asked if she could be buried with it. We didn’t bury my Mom with her wand, but Sonia, her beloved caregiver now has it in her car, keeping it by her side wherever she goes. Sonia also took up crafting the wands with me, as we sat vigil with my Mom during her passing. It was a sign, another meant to be experience that Sonia would join me in making these creations.

As for Linton, he lived for a few months past my Mom's death, and has since passed. His is death was filled with depth, and power – and pain…. that it’s easy to question if the wand was of any merit. I am not sure of how magic works exactly. I am beginning to suspect that it is real; that while it can’t solve the problems of our every day human dilemmas (like magic wands are supposedly designed to do) it is linked to love and sincerity for a higher order for people and for our world. I’d like to think there is possibility of that energy magic in each piece that I make. I have heard some great reports so far from some pretty wanderful people.

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